Cancer is a Scary Word
I remember in the hospital the attending physician said to me, “From this point forward everything in your life will revolve around cancer.”
I didn’t understand what he meant exactly. Now two years later, I get it.
I exercise and my muscles get sore, maybe even a deep soreness: Is “It” cancer?
My stomach gets upset. Is “It” cancer?
Can I eat this or that? Should I eat this or that?
How do I manage my toxic load? What is toxic load?
So on and so forth… One fear domino falling after another.
Managing the fear is ongoing and it sneaks up on me at the most innocent of moments.
Some of my friends don’t want to use the word, Cancer or they go through the gyrations of
changing the C to a small c. Grammar contortionist.
Fear can be exhausting. Managing it. Expelling it. Deleting it. For me it is a major source
of cancer fatigue.
So, I….
- breathe
- sit out in the sunlight.
- write in my journal.
- go for a walk
- breathe
- ride it out and fully feel the fear
- talk to one of my Crew
- note it for my next therapist appointment.
- read something inspirational
- read the my spiritual text
- play with something. create something. (For me this is art and crystals)
- get some rest.
- take a long shower
- listen to a meditation or Zen music on YouTube
- begin thanking God, people, humanity for…. whatever you can feel grateful for.
- breathe
- talk to my body and ask it where this sensation is coming from
- talk to my body and thank it for working. I thank the parts that are picking up the slack and keeping me alive.
- breathe the I AM THAT I AM until I fall asleep
- I put a body length pillow along the front of myself and hug it.
- drink a warm drink. Turmeric or hot lemon water are my favorites
- remind myself that it is okay to be afraid. I haven’t done anything wrong. I didn’t create this.
- breathe
Sometimes when you are well enough and strong enough, create a “This is what I AM going to do when I feel afraid,” plan. Try to become independent. Your Crew – family and friends are great! Cancer fatigue is real for them too! One day I made calls to my Crew and told them thank you and expressed why they are important to me. I felt great afterwards! It felt wonderful to NOT be talking about cancer.
Avoid the spiritual by-pass. A spiritual by-pass is when you are faking it until you are making it. It’s not efficient or kind, What you feel is real. Give yourself permission to feel it fully so that it can be shifted, really shifted with honor, integrity and with loving consciousness.
Finally, I really monitor and check how I talk about cancer. I don’t claim it or at least I try not to own it. If I say, “my cancer,” these are the times that I am a grammar contortionist. The cancer that is in my body. The cancer that is healing within me. The lessons (THE LEARNINGS) I have received from cancer. Whenever I CAN I create the I CAN culture. I focus on the I CANs as points of gratitude.
- I AM so grateful that I CAN cook and clean my kitchen today.
- I AM so grateful that I CAN sit up without pain today.
- I AM so grateful that I CAN rest and meditate today. (that brain fog can be a _____. You fill in the blank)
- I AM so grateful that I CAN walk to my weekly meeting at the spiritual center.
- I AM so grateful that I CAN teach Radiant Soul Balancing.
- I AM so grateful that this website is up and running.
- I AM so grateful for the relationship I have with my family.
The Spirituality of Cancer: The I CAN Culture & The Consciousness of Living through the Power of I AM.
Namaste
May You Know The Divine Intimately
Mercedes
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Citrine & Sage: Soul Conversations on November 23rd at The Enchanted Forrest Reiki Center
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© 2019 Mercedes Warrick, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
